Our journey began when our first adopted son, Zarid, passed away. He was born with Down Syndrome and passed away at 18 months due to Interstitial Lung Disease (hardening of the lungs) and a hole in his heart.
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| Zarid |
Like most babies who are medically fragile, he was 24 hour care with oxygen, pumps, and life sustaining machines. Maintaining his life was a 24 hour job that we were willing to put everything else on hold to do.
When he passed away all I could do and wanted to do was sleep. When the medical bills piled so high, I was forced to call on them. I was amazingly shocked at the response of the PCMC hardship committee. They proposed a flat rate that my family could afford. After thanking them profusely, I asked what else I could do to show my appreciation. The young man asked if I had heard of Festival of the Trees. He suggested that I decorate and donate a tree in memory of my son.
I am sure that when he suggested decorating a tree for Festival, he did not know that this was going to keep my family together and save my life.
Two years later we had another opportunity to adopt another baby. We named him Kemo. He was born with the exact same health issues as Zarid. And lived for only a month.
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| Kemo |
Once again, our family mourned. My arms ached. I could often smell him in the oddest places at the weirdest times.
Again all I wanted to do was sleep.
The following year, our middle son, Paul Jr at the age of 20 was murdered. No words can describe our pain and once again our hearts ached. Our other children questioned why. A judicial trial soon began. An an entire community mourned.
The only thing that got me through each loss was participation in Festival of the Trees.
Each year, I take a few months to work on the tree, get donations and make ornaments that allow me to feel that once more I am taking care of them. It's important to me to get my family involved and include them in making and setting up the tree. While doing this, we share memories and stories to those who were too young remember and the next generation who didn't know them. They have been able to listen to memories that included them. I look forward to my family getting together to help put the tree together. I look forward to my idea coming together. I look forward to sharing and laughing at the memories. All year I think of my theme and I look forward to the time I'll spend doing it. I can't wait for the chaos, the family drama, the material mess and all the mistakes I'll make until my tree looks like I want it to. The tears still flow as I decorate and plan because I miss my children and always will.
Festival allows me to look forward to, and find joy in the Christmas Season. For people missing loved ones, Christmas can be the loneliest, saddest part of the year.
I am so thankful for Festival of the Trees. It not only helped us financially with hospital bills, it helped us as a family to stay united and to carry on. As a mom, it provided me the feeling of continuing to care for my children who had passed away. It gave me a reason to get out of bed and to remember the wonderful times that I had with them. I look forward to my reunion with them.
I look forward to being a part of this spectacular fundraising event that does not only assist with the financial stress of medical bills, but supports families through difficult times. It has allowed our family to not only give back to those who helped us and our community, but to strengthen existing families going through similar hardships. We look forward to donating many more trees in honor of our three sons.
To those who started the Festival of the Trees, and those on the Board, we say thank you.
In memory of our three angel boys -- Zarid, Kemo and Paul Jr. Kuhn
With love,
Jen & Paul Sr Kuhn
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| Donated Tree - Festival 2017 |
*** Editor's note. Paul Kuhn is a professional chef. Year after year, Paul Sr & Jen Kuhn can also be found on Thanksgiving day cooking and serving an incredible Thanksgiving Dinner to nurses and doctors that are working during the holiday at Primary Children Hospital.
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